Welcome to Night Vale

Hello, folks! We’re well into spring, even if it doesn’t feel like it, so it’s time to get out of the Winter Wonderland town we’ve been in for the past few months, I think. Especially because that guy buried out front of the house kind of worries me.

And because I played this a WHILE ago but then had homework and papers so we’re even FURTHER into spring.

But I figured I’d wait until around the time of day when the game starts if you move to a new town (sometime in the morning) so Barium has the same amount of time being controlled as Cerium.

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I thought Cerium was about to go scold Promethium and give him a time out or something ridiculous, but she just wanted to talk about cooking. Carry on.

Promethium: But I’m tiiiiired…

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Hello, you beautiful specimen of a sim. : 3

I am not jealous of the voting public this time around. I haven’t a clue which of these cuties I’d pick.

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Silver: WHY??? Oh, this poor sim! Died before her time!

That’s YOUR grave, Silver. Now kindly hop back into it so we can pack it up and take it with us.

… this is also most of the reason that we had to wait to get to the new town.

So, uh… before I got sidetracked by Promethium and Silver, I was going to open this post with…

A friendly desert community where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass overhead while we all pretend to sleep.

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Welcome to Night Vale.

I recently got into listening to Night Vale in… March?… so I was excited to find this town and wanted to use it. : 3

Not going to say everyone should go listen to it after reading this post, but… I don’t think I’ve ever been disappointed when reading/watching something that I’ve been referred to through a legacy I liked.

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As much as I liked building my periodic table, I don’t think the layout was all that conducive to being… a house… so this is the Houston by stonee206 on Mod the Sims, since I was not in a building mood at the time. Most of the greenery was removed because… desert.

I’ll probably demolish and rebuild once school’s over, though, just because I feel more comfortable playing in a house I made myself. : P

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And then we bought the science building because why not.

Barium: Some of the scientists here have hair almost as good as mine.

It’s Sunday, suddenly, so let’s go out and find some locals.

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Or maybe the locals will come look for us.

Barium: Aw, yeah! People even recognize me in the new town!

It’s a Sunday, so why not bring everyone out to the park for a bit?

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Barium: And we need to put the baby on the ground for a bit so he can absorb nutrients from the grass, anyway.

That’s… not how that works. That’s not how anything works.

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So then we have fairies pranking each other, Cerium being mean to Wren (as usual) and Barium telling his daughter how beautiful it is.

You guys can do those things at home! Find something interesting to do!

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Good girl, Wren. You get extra brownie points.

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Cerium: I’m doing magic! That’s interesting, right? Please pay attention to me and change my hair.

Arnold: … that paparazzi is actually quite attractive…

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No idea, who this is, but she’s pretty. : D

She’s also the only person we’ve seen who’s not paparazzi.

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We’ve seen NO ONE but paparazzi, or people who wanted to take our pictures. Or whatever.

Pretty Sim: Paparazzi showed up? I’m outie. *drives away*

Noooooo. ;_;

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I sent Barium over to the radio station, but we didn’t find anyone but these unattended children who have most likely been living out in the desert for months on end.

Which is the only logical conclusion, of course.

Sarah: Ooh! Civilization! Maybe someone with a camera will let us take selfies!


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Barium: Since they apparently let anyone start broadcasting messages all over town, I’m going to interview you for a change.

Paparazzi: I literally have nothing better to do with my life.

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Barium: So, why do you always follow us sims with celebrity stars around? Don’t you have lives?

Paparazzi: To be honest, I have a wife and three lovely kids I haven’t seen in ages, not since I was kidnapped by a vague yet menacing government agency. They implanted me with a chip that needs to be within a certain range of sims carrying a ‘celebrity’ chip implant, or ‘celebrity stars’ as the masses call them. If I stray too far, I will suffer from nausea, inability to control my bladder, throat spiders, and, eventually, internal organ explosion. If my family is listening, I want them to know I love them and…

Barium: And that’s all the time we have for today! đŸ˜€

Wow, now I feel a little bad about all the contempt and abuse we pile onto the paparazzi sims…

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Wren: Time to absorb your grass nutrients.


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Luckily, the vague yet menacing government agency also offers baby teleportation as a public service to sims.


Samarium: You sound cranky, Europium. Didn’t you get enough grass nutrients?

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Samarium: The bigger issue is WHERE DID THE MOON GO????

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Thanks, Cerium. I was just thinking that this town wasn’t broken enough. Keep this up and I won’t fix your hair.

Cerium: We both know you won’t remember to fix it, whether or not I ‘misbehave’. : /

Tru dat.

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I’m not sure who, but someone made a single slice of pie.


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… seems harmless.

I mean, Neo’s been singlehandedly keeping the babies alive anyway, so it won’t even be like anything’s different.

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Neo: Don’t worry, little baby. I’ll take good care of you while your mommy’s on vacation.

Samarium: I HAVE A MOM??


Shouldn’t you be at school, Neo?

Neo: There is no school.

… I’ll fix it.

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Paparazzi: Phew! Only a few minutes before the throat spiders would have set in. o_o

Promethium: Neo? There’s a lady outside our house. Should I get the hose?

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Sammy became a cute lil’ toddler, and I changed her wings to not clash with her favorite color.

Which is a bright, bright yellow.

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Paparazzi #2: If I just stand out here all night, I can avoid the nausea and spiders…

No one cares about your throat spiders, man. Go home.

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Silver: New town? Huh.


Silver: Mind pointing me in the direction of where you dropped our graves? I think I want to mourn myself a bit more.

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Look at this totally reputable school plopped in the middle of the sand, guys.

I would send, like, all my kids there.

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Promethium: NEO, WE GOT A RUNNER!


Fifteen minutes later:

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Andromeda: Thanks for letting me out of the net.

Promethium: Well, once your ankles are cuffed together, you can’t really get all that far. Hold on for one moment.

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Thanks, Promethium. I was just thinking we hadn’t failed yet. : /

Andromeda: Maybe the keys to the cuffs are in his pocket…

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Wouldn’t be easier to do homework together if you two were next to one another? Or facing one another?

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Europium: While you were paying attention to my brother, I became this.

Good job.

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Oh no! Neo’s gone over to the dark side!

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Paparazzi Guy: You know, I’m really tired.


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Paparazzi Guy: I mean it, really… where’d she go.

She literally just disappeared. Like… blip! And gone. My guess is abducted by a vague yet menacing government agency.

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Or murdered by a ghost.

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Paparazzi: So… can I take your picture?

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And then the parents came home, so yay. No one aged up over the vacation and promptly died when they got home!


Self Wetting : 14 -120
Fires: 4 -20
Electrocutions: 3 -15
Passing Out : 34 -170
Failing School : 0
Accidental Deaths : (0)
Social Worker Visit : (0)
Game breakiness that’s my own fault : 2

Every Birth : 14 +70
Twins : (5) +50
Triplets : (1) +20
Fulfilling LTWs : 6 +240
NTH Spouse Reaching Top of Career : (0)
Every Honor Roll : 9 +45
Every 100,000 simoleons earned : 1 +20
Painting of Torch Holder (4) + 20

TOTAL = 135

Heir poll will be up soon tho.

Kissing Cousins

Hey, guys! Long time no see!

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Wait, wait, wait.

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Arnold continues to constantly work on playing his instruments. He might actually get close to reaching his LTW, at least.

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I sent Cerium out to the potion shop, because why not. I haven’t played around with all these elixir things yet. So now Cerium is a witch.

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And Wren is preggles.

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We’ve had a wand sitting around the house for a while… a wedding gift from someone or other… so I thought we could use it. Level up those magic skills and unlock more spells!

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Neo: If we’re rich, why can’t we have a more opulent house? With emeralds and diamonds everywhere?

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That is not a happy face.

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Autonomous interactions are always so cute.

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Barium: Oh, my love. You are my muse.

Wren: *sigh*

That looks nothing like her, Barium.

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… not more of this, please.

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Barium: Can I have your autograph?

… I’ll put up with the asking family members for autographs thing, since it’s not as bad as when the family members are ready to jump each other’s bones. : /

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I’m not sure why Barium is talking about vegetables.

Barium: Are you kidding? Vegetables are IMPORTANT.

Neo: Dad, I’m pretty sure 90% of the food I’ve eaten in my life has been cake. I turned out pretty okay.

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… so I played this stuff before being suddenly hit with a ton of homework, so I don’t remember a lot of things that happened. I hope I won’t be faulted for patting myself on the back too much for this.


Seriously, guys. We’re going out.

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To the pool. And, by the pool, I mean ‘a public restroom’. Apparently.

Cerium: It’s your turn to deal with the kid.

Wren: No, it’s your turn.

Neo: … seriously? We’re leaving the baby on the floor? This is a bathroom!

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Neo: Don’t worry, baby. I’ll take care of you.

This one’s Sam, right? It’s been a while.

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Barium: Nothing more revealing?

Wren: … I’m giving birth in a few days, Barium.

Barium: So? Every woman here is potentially giving birth in a few days. Pregnancies last less than a week.

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Cerium: Window.

Promethium: Homework.

Glad we’re making the most of this outing.

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Wren: Homework.

In the snow?

… you know I let you guys go out to the POOL, right?

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Cerium: I’m a good mother.

… Sam’s been here alone for half an hour, while you were staring out a window.

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Barium and Wren are the last ones here at the pool, with Sam left on the ground.

I’ll have Barium head home with the kid when my control switches over to him.

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… oops. Cerium was there all along.

Well, she’s stuck now.

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Her in-laws are all fairies and a witch.

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Happy birthday, Promethium!

At least Arnold made it.

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… and the new baby was born while I was paying attention to Promethium.

He’s friendly, and he hates the outdoors. His name is Europium, which comes after Samarium.

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Come on, Promethium, I have to take a picture of you.

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Hey Promethium! Looking pretty snazzy. His new trait is the Haha You Think I Remember This trait.

… I’ll… I’ll, um, have that written down when it’s time to vote.

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… we were doing so well, Promethium.


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Here’s Europium, in the event that you’ve never seen a Sims 3 baby before, or if you’ve gotten used to Sims 4 babies.

Anyway, it’s Prom Nigh-

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Eugh. o_o

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… even though he’s never been to school before, Promethium is Prom King. Well, as long as…

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Neo: Crack a joke. Go ahead and try.

Play for effect.

Screen Shot 2015-03-13 at 11.31.27 AMNeo found a guy she apparently likes, so I guess we’ll be checking him out at some point. Although he’s probably not going to be the spouse, as I’ve been thinking of moving soon.

Oh, and it was Cerium’s birthday!

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Cerium: … why are my ears suddenly cold?

… I’m keeping it. xD


Self Wetting : 14 -120
Fires: 4 -20
Electrocutions: 3 -15
Passing Out : 33 -165
Failing School : 0
Accidental Deaths : (0)
Social Worker Visit : (0)
Game breakiness that’s my own fault : 2

Every Birth : 14 +70
Twins : (5) +50
Triplets : (1) +20
Fulfilling LTWs : 6 +240
NTH Spouse Reaching Top of Career : (0)
Every Honor Roll : 9 +45
Every 100,000 simoleons earned : 1 +20
Painting of Torch Holder (4) + 20

TOTAL = 140